17) The Carrot
- Once mentioned as a passing observation, this term for a long, slender, slowly emerging poo has since been adopted as a common part of Miles’s poop lexicon. In Miles’s words, “The Carrot” is “a big one,” the completion of which must be accompanied by majestic fanfare to the tune of “doot duh-duh DOO!” While the poop itself may or may not resemble an actual carrot, you’ll know it’s coming when Miles explains, through gritted teeth, “This one’s a carrot,” or, “I’m doin’ a carrot. It’s a big one,” while sitting on the potty.
The Perils (& Pride) of Paternity 