Year 4, Day 75

As children with overactive imaginations are wont to do, Miles has started talking about some sort of ghoulish figure plaguing his thoughts. At first, he “saw him in the window,” then he was “in the closet.” Miles has even yelled his name to us when running around the house playing, as though the mere mention of the creature’s nomenclature is enough to send shockwaves of terror shooting through our bodies. It’s wholly ineffective, mainly because 1) Miles has yet to actually describe what this thing looks like and 2) because the boogeyman’s name, according to Miles, is “Scary Gary Gumble,” which sounds like the name of a dopey teenage bully who is easily outsmarted by a band of wily rascals after school one day.

“Ah, look!” Miles will exclaim. “It’s the Scary Gary Gumble!”

“Who is Scary Gary Gumble?” I’ll always ask.

“Scary!” he’ll say.

“And it’s a…monster?”

“Yeah!”

“…whose name is ‘Gary’.”

“Yeah, Scary Gary Gumble!”

Mercifully, Miles doesn’t appear to be legitimately terrified of this entity, mentioning almost in a playful way. But then I’ve seen The Exorcist enough times to know that it ALWAYS starts playfully.

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