Day 84

Today was a tragic day at the apartamento de Martin, as we had to retire Miles’s favorite bedtime onesie. And by that I mean my favorite.

It wasn’t that it was his cutest or softest bedtime attire; no, this onesie was the most practical piece of baby clothing I’ve encountered thus far. At first glance, it looks like any other onesie, but look closer and you’ll see it’s missing something. Or several somethings, to be more precise.


Yes, this onesie, from the aptly-named “Smart Close” (I see what they did there) line by Magnificent Baby, has none of the infernal snap buttons common among lesser baby garments. Instead, this space-age piece of clothing uses revolutionary magnets to make getting baby in and out of his clothing nearly effortless. Sure, Jaclyn managed to misalign the magnets once in a while, but even that was a quick fix (snap buttons on the other hand…forget about it).

I don’t know what the future holds, but I will inevitably lose 10-20 seconds every three days now that Miles has outgrown this onesie. I assume this is the first in a long line of sorrowful moments I’ll experience as a father, watching my son grow and knowing that I’ll never truly be able to recapture the past.

Or maybe there are some larger sizes on Amazon. And also some adult dress shirts.

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