Here’s a fun new game Jaclyn and I have been playing. I’ll be looking for an item — maybe a pacifier, or a burp cloth, or a blanket — and Jaclyn’s response will be, “It’s next to his…” and then her voice will just trail off. So I’m left with a vague understanding that the object in question is located next to something else that belongs to Miles, but ultimately finding said object is still largely up to my sleuthing skills.
The real problem at the heart of Jaclyn’s dazed rhetoric is (and I’m sure anyone who is already a parent will be able to relate) that Miles’s stuff has taken over virtually every nook and cranny of the apartment. So that pacifier I’m looking for? Maybe it’s on Jaclyn’s dresser with the last swaddle blanket we used. Or maybe it’s on the coffee table next to a rag and a couch that’s perpetually covered in a pile of Miles’s clean laundry. Or maybe the only answer is next to the freshly sterilized bottles in the kitchen. Either way, even the simplest of questions often becomes a timeless quest when Baby Miles is involved.
The Perils (& Pride) of Paternity 