Year 3, Day 316

Today was, for what I hope are obvious reasons, one of those days where despite the rising despair in the pit of your stomach, you can’t really pull yourself away from the news. Jaclyn said she was unable to work after about 2:00 PM, and while I did my best to stay focused on my own job, I’ll freely admit that I did so while news streamed on a separate browser tab.

When I arrived home, Jaclyn still had the news running, while Miles was running around the house playing with toys. For a split second I considered whether we should even be watching scenes from the US Capitol while Miles was in the room, but I ultimately thought that it was too important to turn off and, thankfully, Miles is really too young to be able to understand exactly what happened today.

With Miles relatively content, Jaclyn and I went about our evening as best we could, never straying too far from the TV. Jaclyn got some dinner together for Miles and as I stood there watching the evening news, I reached over and ran my hand over Miles’s head as he took a drink. It was as much for me as it was for him — he events of the day were deeply disturbing, and I needed something comforting to ground me. But I also wanted Miles to know, regardless of how much he could or couldn’t grasp about everything, that I was there to keep him safe. Whatever sort of day it is, that’s always a good thing to refresh in a young child’s mind.

As I moved my hand away, Miles finished a gulp of his drink then pulled the cup away from his mouth.

“Do it again,” he said.

There was a lot of head rubbing tonight.

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