Day 56

Following the consumption of something that catastrophically failed to agree with her, Jaclyn spent most of the day in bed feeling miserable. While I certainly felt bad for her, I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t been looking at the situation optimistically, as it gave me and Miles a chance to hang out, no girls allowed. Our morning consisted of staring at each other and jamming out to Rod Stewart, but it wasn’t all fun and games. No, this morning revealed to me the hardest part of parenting a newborn.

Naptime. And not baby naptime, either…ADULT NAPTIME. Managing naps while the baby rests is easy, so long as he’s in his bassinet. The problem is that this was never the time I felt ready for a nap. Toss the baby on my shoulder — he’s out and I get drowsy. Throw the kid into his swing…I am OUT.

I understand that, as a supervising adult, you’re not supposed to fall asleep while your infant child is in a swing. But if that’s the case, did they need to make it SO GODDAMN INVITING of sleep? The whirring and clicking as my son swings back and forth, looking chill as anything, is basically an over-sized metronome. And Miles just falling asleep on my shoulder? Melatonin only WISHES it worked so well.

Miles makes me want to sleep not because I’m exhausted, but because I feel at peace. I’m not sure I’ve ever experienced this before.

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